...away on business

Peter Weiermann

...away on business

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Inhaltsverzeichnis

Titel

Impressum

Prolog

“Epo”

Eating

Sanitary facilities

India

Korea

On the plane ✈

In China

The free market

At the airport

Thailand

England

On the road

This and that

Behavior

Little misunderstanding

Meetings

Sense of orientation

Well-known song

Technological advance

Observations

Behavior

Humor

Visit to Germany

On site

Indonesia

Wrong plane

Impressum neobooks

Impressum

Impressum

©2018 by Peter Weiermann

E-mail: pweiermann@aol.com

English translation: Cindy Lorenz

German book title: …auf Geschäftsreise

All rights reserved. Reproduction and distribution only by written permission of the author.

Prolog

It so happened that one day my boss was of the opinion that I would do less harm to the company if he sent me on business trips, preferably as far away as possible, maybe even to Asia.

In fact, I am still amazed at how it is possible to get anywhere with limited English language skills, an even more limited sense of direction and a small credit card. Incidentally, my language skills are really not that much of a problem because most Asians with whom I'm deal are not language experts either. Ironically, I do not know how many times I have traveled around the world over the past 20 years, but it has been several times. Some moments and impressions are actually trivial things that just belong to traveling, but they can also be things a west European would just like to ignore by laughing it away. They can make you smile or be amazed or even make you stop and think. They are simply snapshots that are rarely consciously perceived because other things are of course in focus. You want to get from A to B to do your job there. These impressions are just side effects, but in and of themselves they often look very strange to a so-called foreigner. Also, I notice that the tiny spot on the map called Germany is not necessarily the center of the world, or is it?

As long as one or the other of these impressions is still in my memory, I would like to capture and pass on these moments to you, dear reader, with the aim of giving you a little something to do in your leisure time. Maybe you're on a journey of your own as you read these lines, maybe even on a business trip or on vacation, or wherever, but nonetheless on the go. It may be that you will discover yourself here within this journal because you have just experienced something similar or have already experienced it in the past. Just one more thing before we start, however. If my opinions, which are subjectively expressed, are met with any displeasure, I beg your pardon. No one should accuse me of a deliberate aversion to persons, groups or things because this is definitely not intended. Quite the contrary, we should all respect each other’s cultural background and habits. I have not included my comments in a chronological order because, in my opinion, this does not detract from the contents in any way. At any rate, I sincerely hope you will enjoy reading the following.

“Epo”

The initial trigger for capturing such little anecdotes occurred as I was once again on a business trip in Shanghai. It is 6 a.m. in the morning and as tired as I am, I get into the taxi in front of the hotel and the taxi driver says to me, “Epo??”

"Uh, what?" I answer, trying hard to decide what he means. After a period of deliberation, I guess correctly and answer with amusement, "Yes please, Epo!" The sophisticated reader already suspects the correct translation, it means “airport”. Problem solved. A very interesting experience.

The driver's next statement was, "Betsching?" I understand now (he means Beijing) and I answer, "No, Seoul, Korea!" Now everything's been discussed and we leave the hotel. Arriving at the EPO, I have the joy of having started the day in good humor and give the driver a generous tip which he probably did not expect. He is all smiles as he drives off and waves at me until he is no longer visible. “EPO”, how nice to know.

In general, my experience has been that when I smile, I will be smiled back at; if I look grim I will get grim looks in return. Or, as Mark Twain once put it, "Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see."

Life is composed of many small moments. There are so many beautiful, funny, instructive occasions. They go by and never come back. That's why I like to pause and enjoy the moment. Too soon everyday obligations always bring me back.

Eating

As it is with many people when they are asked how their vacation was, the first response is a detailed report about the food as if this were the most important aspect. Honestly, this is not so wrong. After all, food is an elementary component. So of course it is obvious that the issue of food should receive adequate attention when sharing my impressions.

Once we received a large order from a company and, and as is often the case, the customers invited us to dinner. My colleague and I were together along with 7 or 8 Chinese customers. Even organizing the trip with several cars turned out to be loud and chaotic. Once arriving at the restaurant, we were led into a small private room with a huge round table. This becomes a special challenge to me, who dislikes any seafood that is not clearly identifiable as fish. We are invited to a so-called hot-pot meal. Well, I think, that doesn’t sound too bad after all. A drink of hard liquor is offered as an aperitif. Of course, we are being tested as to how well we hold our drink. Chinese love heavy-drinking as if there were no other variety. I get the impression that it's a shame not to be an alcoholic. Nevertheless, I hold myself back due to an empty stomach, etc. There is a large pot on the table that is divided down the middle and has two different boiling liquids in it. The waiters appear while balancing several trays which are filled with something that looks like striped intestines with a yellow-greenish shimmering patina. This indefinable something is poured into the pot and some vegetables are added. This very sight alone and the accompanying thought that I have to eat it causes me to break out in a sweat.

I feel scrutinizing eyes watching us as if we had been invited to dinner with a future mother-in-law. How will these “long noses”, meaning Europeans, behave now? My colleague exhibits a similar horror which is written all over his face. Well, what do we do now? I decide to drink a glass of schnapps that is about the size of a small drinking glass (no shot glass) in one go; this of course to the delight of all those present. At least this temporarily fogs my senses and innards somewhat and I pacify myself with the thought that at least the boiling broth has killed all the bacteria and I should expect no signs of intoxication. The two liquids in the pot differ in each case from very hot to indescribably hot which under the circumstances suits me just fine.

Another Chinese culinary experience takes place in a locality that reminds me of a butcher shop with a giant aquarium, which, however, offers anything but normal fish. There are oversized worms, animals with strangely long antennae, and ‑ excuse my idiom ‑ other elements that look like floating, snow-white penises. Just totally disgusting. Our delegation goes straight to these aquariums and I reluctantly follow behind. My worst fears are confirmed when I am made to understand that I should put together a selection of food from it. My imagination is not big enough to see myself eating anything of what is swimming around here at all; I'd rather starve to be honest. So I sneak back and forth for about 10 minutes and always have to go around a strange big black pile of something that lies on the floor which I do not even consciously perceive since my eyes are so glued to the diving vermin in the aquarium. When I notice that this heap is moving though, I am very shocked and look more closely. Bullfrogs! My stomach flinches involuntarily and tells me that it does not agree with any of this. Like a sign from heaven, I find something edible on a shelf. It’s a kind of dessert, steamed bread. I like this foamy sweet bread very much, which I finally select after a felt eternity and to the incomprehension of my Chinese companions.

The story of "fresh" oysters in China as a farewell dinner before the trip home also gave me an unforgettable flight home. I would just like to mention that here but not go into any of the details. Just let your imagination run free. The result certainly comes very close to my own experience.

Sanitary facilities

Not that I want to lower expectations any further by sharing certain experiences, but the sanitary facilities are quite peculiar here and there in Asian countries and these quiet little places are already a chapter in and of themselves. However, in making comparisons, I realize that there are big differences in this area.

Once I enter a restroom and am quite startled because the toilet lid rises automatically. This is obviously a high-tech toilet, a quiet place with extremely extensive electronics such as a lighted and heated seating area with targeted warm water jets at the push of a button. How would you like it, a little further ahead or rather a bit further back? Pulsating or rather with a light jet stream? No problem here. And naturally with subsequent blow drying options! Everything at the touch of a button. Even flushing and lowering of the lid happen automatically. But that's not all that new after all. I am reminded of a song that we sang as children, "My grandma has a chamber pot with lights!" And what is this, a remote control option in the restroom? Shouldn’t there be a TV hidden somewhere? I really can’t find one. But what is that for a dull spot in the mirror? No kidding, a mirror with an integrated TV. This is unbelievable. They are crazy, the Chinese. And once again I think that my kids would love it. Of course the bathroom would probably be constantly occupied...

India

Let's take a quick detour to India. One of my sons spent a whole year there and summed up the country in a short sentence, "Chaotic but sympathetic". And how right he is. In any case, I can only confirm this.

If you know what a gecko is and if you've already seen one, you also know that it's a useful and harmless animal for humans. You may not be as upset as I am by finding such an animal in the bedroom. It looks like a transparent lizard. I almost freeze in horror when I see it from the bed and find no peace until I have done away with this vermin. There was a wet spot on the wall caused by my hotel slippers. When I complained about this uninvited guest the next morning, the hotel personnel instruct me to let him be. The gecko eats insects. I do not care. I do not want this creature in the same room with me. What if I turn off the lights and the eyes??? No thanks! Not with me.

Let us spend some time in India. I'll take you on a short drive through downtown Bombay. Not everything is bad there, but it might be a bit bad for you. This consists of the noise and shaking from driving over and through potholes and various odors and other things. We see beggars who gather around the vehicle anytime you have to stop. Begging women with babies in their arms knock against the glass. A policeman, who has rolled up his newspaper, hits the begging woman on the head as if she were a bothersome fly and drives her away. There are crippled people and many children. To my right are habitats of the poorest in the form of plastic sheets over a wooden pole as a dwelling; around it mud, garbage and dirt. There is a water hole where the whole family washes, after which the food is washed and afterwards the clothes ‑ or in a different order. I have to swallow the lump that has formed in my throat. I wanted to take a few impressions with me but do not dare to unpack my camera. But I do that without a camera. These are images that my brain cannot process so quickly. Yes, there are even two men, both of whom do nothing but hold a big billboard of a world-famous electric company. One stands on the left, the other on the right, each with a water bottle at his feet. I wonder if they are still standing there.

There is another curious picture I see while driving past. There are women in brightly colored robes, barefoot and with a pickaxe and shovel to perform any road construction work or pile stones on top of each other. There are those living under bridges and lying on the ground who have become one with the dirt on the streets and aren’t even recognized at first glance if they are already dead or alive. After about a 2 hours’ drive across Mumbai, I arrive at my destination in need of a cognac. Even without food, it hits me in the stomach. Oh dear, alcohol is apparently extremely frowned upon in India. Apologies are made to the restaurant staff and mention is made that the alcohol is needed for medicinal purposes only. As an additional lesson, I am told that when a man goes to a restaurant to eat without his wife, it is said that his wife is a bad cook.

In addition, I must mention that I had this experience in 2003. When I go there again a few years later, the external conditions have improved after my first impressions but only just a little bit.

I would like to mention one moment in time that is personally meaningful to me. Leaving the hotel I see two very poor figures sitting on a wall in front of the entrance. In my opinion they are very poor. I look at one directly. Our eyes suddenly meet and mingle in a strange way and for a prolonged moment we maintain this eye contact. It seems to me as if time is standing still for a moment and I experience two very different worlds looking into each other's eyes and hearts. We smile at each other.

Anyway, at this point I have to say that the people there, as in many other parts of Asia and elsewhere in the world, seem noticeably much happier even when they have less than our society of western Europeans. This includes the constant complaining about every ailment, the weather and every little thing that matters, what does not suit you right now, what needs to change, etc., etc. If you look at it this way, our degree of dissatisfaction is very high compared to those truly poor people. Someone who really didn’t have anything to laugh about in his life once said something like this, “When I stopped thinking about what I lacked and learned to look at what I have, I realized that what I did have was so much more than what I didn’t have.” This is something to think about. You must be yourself as a European or whatever culture, but I’m still urged to say ‑ whether adult, adolescent or child, or even to myself ‑ "You are so privileged. Be more content with what you have and modest in your demands!" It seems like a silent scream to me from those have nots who fill my thoughts more and more. Do you really have to have 2 or 3 cars? Or eat extravagantly every day, drink alcohol continually, browse the internet without thinking, or buy new clothes for every season? For some of our contemporaries, the biggest concern is where to go on vacation this year and on it goes. Well, let's leave that alone for now.

In fact, during one of my recent stays in India, there was also a so-called "dry day", which literally means "dry day". I think you understand what is meant. Alcohol may not be sold to any Indian. I had to show my ID to prove I was not Indian if I wanted a beer. But here I declare my solidarity and turn it down as well. In all honesty, dear reader, what would it be like if there were such a "dry day" here once in a while? Yes, not everyone would agree with that, right? What else could you drink if the glass of champagne, the beer and the schnapps were not allowed? After all, water is there for washing and not for drinking.

Sorry, but I want to come back to the topic of sanitary facilities again. Have you ever had to use sanitary facilities in India? Your first thought when entering such a facility was certainly, "No! No!! Definitely NO!!! It's not that urgent after all!” But what if? Where do you actually sit down here? And if there is something to sit on, yuck. Where is the paper and what can you wash your hands with and what are those extreme smells? Yes, the questions that arise then are quite profane. But, alas, all superfluous. That's why the Indian only eats with one hand...

Or do you know what it's like to be in India and eat in India? Take Mumbai as an example with its sultry and extremely high humidity, better known as Bombay. There are roads with potholes, riddled like a Swiss cheese and deep holes as if left by a meteorite. Garbage piles on the streets send out their corresponding smells. Misery and poverty and wealth. Just try to pick up the entire broad range with all your senses?

You can be ever so careful when eating and drinking, only brush your teeth with drinking water from a properly sealed bottle, not drink anything with ice cubes in it, eat no salad, eat nothing uncooked, only peeled fruit and all according to the motto: “peel it, cook it, or forget it "... But whatever you do, it’s just not possible to avoid upsetting your stomach. And if you do, then you just have to live through it as best you can. Has anyone else ever had such an experience?

Once I was sitting with the customer for contract negotiations. I felt absolutely wretched and must have looked chalky-white even during the haggling for the best price, which can really be annoying with Indians. They felt compassion for me and someone got me a cola light for “medicinal purposes”. Everybody starts getting signals differently at different times. Sometimes it’s only a slight belly rumble. You think that's normal here, it will go away again. Then the stomach pain slowly increases. Soon all solid and liquid substances escape from the stomach and intestine through the major body openings and this is accompanied by abdominal cramps that can last up to several days. Of course it’s obvious that you should not eat any seafood during the rainy season they tell me. But how do I know when and where is a rainy season? It wasn’t even raining. Yes, everybody else thought it was funny, but not me. Blessed is he who is spared from such occurrences. Unfortunately, it hit me several times.