Under Pressure

At this point, the entire cafeteria fell silent and everyone was looking at them. The silence was so deep that May could almost hear the sound of Ryan's breathing, which was accelerating. Ashley's mouth fell open at the boy's outburst, who stood up, almost knocking over the chair on the floor, and left the cafeteria, throwing the backpack on his back. Nobody dared to say a word during that moment.

May looked away at Ashley who looked angry. She hoped she wouldn't do anything stupid.

"Guys, I'm going after Mandy. I need to find out what's going on" - the girl spoke softly, when the cafeteria came to life. She stood up and Sean did the same.

"I'm going with you, May" - Sean offered, but the girl refused. If something had happened, Sean's presence would be more of a hindrance than a help.

"No, Sean. I'll go. We don't even know what's going on."

"But, May..." he tried again, but she didn't budge.

"She won't tell me anything if you're together, Sean. She's my best friend. Let me talk to her” - she said, needing to be tough on him.

Sean agreed, having no other option. When May started picking up her things to get up, the trio of cheerleaders - Ashley, Hannah and Cheryl - passed by their table and she felt herself shiver. She hoped they wouldn't start picking on Mandy. She knew that type of girl very well. Spoiled preppies who thought the world revolved around their navel. The last thing they needed was to get in trouble with that kind of person.

She waited for the three of them to leave the cafeteria. She put the backpack on her shoulder and went to the library after Mandy.

***

As she passed the reception, Polly smiled at May. The librarian already knew the little redhead, who always showed up looking for her friend.

"Is she here?" - May asked quietly.

"Yes, in the back, with Miss Austen and Sir Shakespeare " - she replied, laughing.

The young woman thanked her and went on to the classics of world literature class. It was no surprise that she was in that area of the library, since Pride and Prejudice was her favorite book. May went through a multitude of bookcases, until a noise caught her eye and she ran towards the sound. Finally, she found Mandy, who was sitting on the floor, with her hair messed up and several books lying around her.

"Mandy?" - She raised her head and looked scared to her friend. Her eyes were full of tears. - "Sweetie, what happened?"

"Ah, May..." - she murmured and the tears she was holding began to fall.

May knelt beside her and pulled her into a hug, feeling helpless.

"Calm down sweetie. It's okay ... don't cry" - she murmured, trying to calm her down. - "Wanna tell me what's going on?"

"I can't explain for sure why I'm like this." - she replied, trying to wipe away the tears.

"Talk to me, friend. You know you can trust me."

Mandy then started talking and told everything: the bump in Ryan in the hall, the partnership in the literature project, the disturbing dream.

"I know it sounds silly, May, but I was very nervous," - she said, wiping away her tears. - "You know I have no experience with boys. And Ryan ... well, I have to be honest ... he shakes me a lot. I never found myself in a situation like this and I didn't know how to act. Worse is that I was rude to him and we still have to do the project together."

Mandy felt even more embarassed. Verbalizing her immature behavior made her feel even worse.

"There's nothing silly, Mandy. I understand. It's very normal for us to feel a little ... overwhelmed, when we don't have experience. Unsafe. Even more next to a boy like him" - May spoke and smiled slightly, trying to calm her down. - "I think I would also be nervous if I had someone like Ryan as a project partner."

May paused briefly and then asked quietly:

"Do you think he's into you?

Mandy opened and closed her mouth a few times, as if she couldn't get the words out. She shook her head, denying.

"No, I think it's his way. You should treat all girls like that." - She raised her arms and gestured. - "He's Ryan McKenna, for God's sake!" - Mandy vented and the two started laughing. Suddenly, May remembered why she went looking for her: the mess in the cafeteria.

"Um ... friend, there was some fuzz in the cafeteria."

"Mess ?"

"Yep. Do you know who Ashley is?" - May asked and Mandy shook his head. - "Do you know a blonde who was at the cafe earlier today with the cheerleaders? She was the only one with her hair up, blue eyes ..."

"Um, I think so" - Mandy said, frowning. - "You know I'm not very attached to these things."

"Yeah, but she saw your incident in the hall." - Mandy's eyes widened slightly. - "And kept asking Ryan about it."

"Oh..."

The girl reported the details of the argument between the two and Mandy listened to everything with her hand over her mouth, scared.

"And now, May? If these girls catch me, I'm screwed!"

"I think the best thing for now is to mind your own business. Have your classes, do it fine. When do you have literature class again?"

"Only next Monday."

"Let's hope this is the only class you will attend with him. Closer to Saturday, we rethink what happened and decide what to do."

"Oh, my God ... I'm going to die of embarassment!" - Mandy hid her face in her hands and burst out laughing at her dramatic demeanor.

" I know, Mandy, but in the end, everything will be fine. I'm sure it will be."

The girls hugged each other again. May tried to be calm, despite being as nervous as her friend. She really hoped everything went well.

"Shall we fix this mess before Polly comes over here and tells us off?" - The redhead asked and Mandy nodded, bending down to pick up some books and began to tidy up the shelves.

Chapter Five

Ryan left the cafeteria angrily and went straight to the gym. The boy needed to do something to vent the anger he was feeling. Not that he was a violent or tough guy, but Ashley had the power to piss him off and take him seriously. But that was nothing new. Since the previous year, when they were still freshmen, her obstinacy in saying that they should be a couple, since he was not attracted to her, had crossed the line. Her insistence - which bordered on obsession - had left him in a position where just hearing her voice would made him angry. If the bullshit she used to say was also considered, the result was not good.

He went into the men's locker room and put his things in the closet with his name, after taking out shorts, T-shirt and sneakers. A run would do him good. The release of endorphins by physical activity would make him cool his head and be calmer. After getting dressed, he went to the court. He was stretching when Dean, his best friend and teammate, showed up.

"Hey, guy! How are you?"

Without stopping to stretch, Ryan stared at the blue eyes of the boy who was as tall and strong as he was, and answered with a grunt.

"Annoyed" - he muttered, continuing to stretch, accompanied by his friend. They were silent for a few moments, until Dean spoke again.

"What happened in the cafeteria, Ry?" - The boy asked, puzzled. - "Each day, you are more impatient with Ash. And this is not the kind of thing that usually happens to you, quite the opposite. You are the most patient guy I know."

Dean was right. The friend was very calm and always encouraged his teammates to have a kinder and friendlier behaviour. He believed that violence led to nothing and that their differences - with anyone - should be solved with dialogue.

But it didn't seem to apply to Ashley.

"Ashley pisses me off, Dean. I can't stand this girl."

"I know, she gets tough sometimes. But did you need to get to that point? And the other girl? Are you going out with her anyway?"

Just hearing about Mandy, the image of the girl with very dark hair and sweet perfume came to his mind. It was strange how a bump made him so impressed ... maybe it was the fact that they attended the same school in high school. Who knows, some kind of recognition ... of familiarity with someone from his hometown. Or, maybe it was Mandy, her delicate and skittish way, that made him want to know everything about her.

"No, man, I'm not. I almost dropped her in the hall, I had to hold her so she wouldn't fall to the floor. Then, when I went to class, I found out that we were in the same class and the teacher assigned us as a pair for the semester project. That's all that happened” - he explained.

The two finished stretching and started running. Their movements seemed rehearsed, foot to foot hitting the ground in a rhythmic way, the result of a lot of training together and a partnership that surpassed the games.

"So, why all that, Ry? If she's a girl you barely know, why fight Ash over her?"

"I do not accept Ashley's arrogant behavior. She has no right to question who I have a relationship with - lovingly or not. And I'm tired of seeing her mistreating people, of making fun of other students. At that time, in the cafeteria, she was making fun of a girl who did nothing to her, just because Mandy is not part of her group of friends. I am against this kind of injustice. I'm even thinking of talking to the cheerleader team coach. As an important member of the team, she needs to be a positive role model for people, and that's not what happens, you know."

Dean looked at him, surprised. As team captain, Ryan has always condemned any aggressive attitude - in any case - on the team. He always had an active voice with the team, stimulated egalitarian attitudes among the players and promoted activities to support the community. But he had never been involved in any controversy with the cheerleaders. The team coach was extremely rigid, she required hard work on choreography and exemplary behavior, and such a complaint could cause Ashley many problems - perhaps even expulsion from the team.

"But who is this girl, Mandy? I don't think I know her” - Dean asked, as they completed the course and started the second lap on the field. Their pace was quite fast.

"Freshman" - Ryan explained.

Dean rolled his eyes and laughed.

"Yeah... Ashley is terrible with freshmen...."

"As if she's never been one" - Ryan pointed out and Dean laughed. They continued to run. Sweat was beginning to wet his hair, but his breathing was controlled. - "She passed us at the entrance. Short, very dark hair with bangs and green eyes." - Dean watched him as Ryan described the girl and was surprised to see a small smile appear on his friend's lips. Yes, Ryan, like Dean, was a popular guy, dated a few girls and there was always someone interested in being his date at campus parties, but the two boys had shown no interest in anyone in particular. They hadn't fallen in love, that was the truth. - "We did high school at the same school."

"Um..." - Dean murmured as they continued to run. They were on the third lap around the field. - "Is it a freshman who arrived with a red-haired fox, in a red car?"

"Ahem" - Ryan nodded, his breath starting to accelerate.

"Dude, she's a fox!" - Dean spoke and Ryan nodded, looking at his friend and trying to find out if his friend was interested in her. - "But she's serious, isn't she? She and her friend took a class with me before lunch"

"I think so" - Ryan replied, uncomfortable. Was the friend interested in her? Suddenly, he felt a knot in his stomach and his heart racing.

I think the strong sun is doing me harm. It can only be that, he thought to himself.

The boys ran a little more in silence. When they completed the sixth lap, Dean slowed down, being accompanied by Ryan.

"I'm going to stop" - Dean said, and Ryan nodded. - "I have class in twenty minutes."

Ryan agreed and the two went to the locker room, still in silence. On the way, he went over the conversation, feeling that discomfort again.

***

The summer days in Providence passed slowly. Ryan saw Mandy a few times in the halls, always quiet, with her redheaded friend. He realized that she was very different from most Brown girls, who used to wear short, low-cut clothes and flirt with guys in and out of classrooms. Her clothes were always well behaved and her shyness barely allowed her to talk to a stranger.

The first time they met in the corridor, after literature class, their eyes met and she seemed to be the color of her friend's hair. Ryan smiled and she dropped her eyes and quickened her pace. On another occasion, he was running around the football field with the guys on the team. Looking at the bleachers, he saw that she was sitting, writing something in what appeared to be a notebook. He couldn't take his eyes off her. As he ran, he saw Mandy looking away, as if thinking about something. She brought the pencil to her lips, biting the tip. A few seconds later, she wrote again. He was already on the ninth lap when she realized he was there. Their eyes met. He smiled and blinked as he passed. Mandy looked back over her shoulder, as if confirming that he was really blinking and smiling to her.

By just remembering the reaction, a silly smile appeared on his face. He thought she was so cute that he couldn't help but be more and more interested in her.

And so, the week went by. Ryan stole glances from Mandy on campus lawns, winked as he passed her in the halls and smiled every time he met her unexpectedly on the way.

At night, before going to sleep, her eyes popped into his mind and he wondered what was so special that made him daydream, wanting to touch her soft hair, steal kisses from her full lips and feel her body against his. At times, the memory of their first meeting made him remember the way she treated him, wondering why he was wasting time, wanting a girl who was obviously not interested in him. But it was enough to remember the feeling of having her in his arms, to make caution flow out the window, making him anxious for more.

Every Friday, Ryan, like many Brown students, volunteered. Teachers used to recruit students to provide social service in the activities in which they stood out or had an affinity, as a way of helping the community. He was a coach on the children's basketball team and had worked with boys aged 7 to 10 years for almost a year. In the beginning, it had been a challenge for the coach, who said that as the team captain, he needed to develop essential leadership skills, team coordination and set an example. And, nothing better than teaching a kids full of energy to learn this. But the class was so much fun that, for Ryan, it was no longer an obligation and became a great pleasure.

Providence was a city full of parks. One of the most famous, Prospect Park, was close to the university. The place, where the statue of the city's founder, theologian Roger Williams, was located, had a privileged view of the city. People of all ages exercised in the region, practicing basketball, running, cycling, among other sports, for being an open place and full of fresh air, with its big trees. Many physical education teachers from public schools in the region took their students to train in the park, as a way to encourage them to practice sports and encourage healthy living.

Since moving from Gloucester to Providence, Ryan has lived on the outskirts of Brown. The park was just a few minutes from his apartment and he usually took that way on foot. On the way to the court, he passed by some acquaintances who waved to him, greeting him. The day is beautiful, Ryan thought to himself as he walked. The sun was shining brightly and the sky was blue, without a cloud to hinder the beautiful view. When he arrived on the court, he saw that the sixteen boys who trained with him were already stretching and preparing to play. When they saw Ryan, they greeted him and split into two teams. When everyone was ready, the boy whistled to signal the start of the game and threw the ball into the air.

The children competed for the ball, excited, while he was shouting directions to each player.

"Fred, look at the spin!" - he warned one of the students. - "Run, Larry, run!"

A few minutes after the start of the game, Ryan heard a song in the distance. It was Tchaikovsky's Waltz of Flowers, he identified. His mother loved the Nutcracker ballet and had heard this song several times in their home. He turned to see where the sound was coming from and was surprised by the sight.

Fourteen girls stood in a line, in a semicircle, on their toes. In the rhythm of the music, they revolved around themselves and little by little the circle opened up. Then, Mandy came along. The boy's eyes traveled slowly over her body, admiring her perfect shape covered by a light pink leotard, which kept her firm arms out. A small black skirt, tied to the right side, wrapped around her body. Her shapely legs were covered in a pantyhose in the same shade of pink as the leotard, and she wore a pair of red flats, whose satin straps wrapped around her ankle. Her dark hair was tied up in a bun and she looked completely different from her basic day-to-day style.

Ryan continued to watch her movements with his jaw dropped. She moved her arms and legs, tiptoeing. The smaller girls split into two rows, all on tiptoes, spinning through the open space, while Mandy jumped in the center of them, making precise movements. The two rows of girls moved away from Mandy, who remained in the center, focused on her movements. He had no idea that she was so good, and his heart was racing and his breath was wheezing as he watched her dance.

Her movements continued. The two rows of girls circled her again and she leaned forward, disappearing into that sea of little pink tutus. Ryan couldn't look away. The girls finished the circle and Mandy appeared again, doing pirouettes. She turned toward Ryan and finally realized that he was there, looking at her. Her face turned red and she looked away quickly.

Suddenly, the boy heard screams from the boys, which diverted his attention from the dance and, when he turned around, saw a ball flying full force towards him. There was no time to deviate. The ball hit his head, knocking him to the ground.

Ouch. Damn.

The pain was so great that he felt like he was seeing stars.

The boys huddled around him, asking numerous questions, wanting to know if he was okay. He blinked a few times, focused his eyes and sat down, rubbing his head where the ball hit him. Unable to contain himself, he looked again in the direction in which Mandy was dancing. She was standing, as were the little girls, all looking in his direction, frightened. He smiled at her, trying to show that he was fine and saw the relief in her eyes. But, unintentionally, he hit the lump that was forming on his head with his hand, which caused a grimace of pain. When he looked at her again, she was laughing as she tried to hide her good humor from her confusion.

"Are you OK?" - She asked, making the move with her lips, so that he could understand what she was saying from afar.

"Yes" - he replied, smiled back and stood up. Apart from the monstrous headache he was feeling and the hurt pride, yes, he was fine.

"Boys, rest assured" - he said, addressing the class. - "I am fine."

"I'm sorry, Ry. I miscalculated the direction and strength of the ball" - one of the boys said, looking ashamed and guilty.

"Don't worry, Leo, these things happen." - The little boy smiled at him, who reciprocated despite the pain he was feeling. - "Shall we continue, guys?"

The boys ran back to the court, followed by Ryan, who took a seat on a bench near the field. A few moments later, he looked again in the direction in which Mandy was dancing, but there was no one else there.

He sighed, thinking he would meet her the next day at the library. He just hoped that by then the headache would have eased.