The Taming of Dr Alex Draycott
Joanna Neil
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Cover
Title Page
About the Author
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Copyright
Dear Reader
It takes all sorts to make a world, doesn’t it? Some people are driven to make a success of their careers to the point where they lose sight of what really matters. Others are serene and laid-back, taking life as it comes and never getting overly concerned about anything.
This set me to thinking. What if two such people met and struck sparks off one another? How could a relationship ever work between them—especially if neither of them was looking for anything permanent?
And that was exactly the problem that confounded Callum and Alex when they met and clashed in the A&E department.
Alex had so much to cope with after adversity had struck her family, so she wasn’t in any mood to tread softly around anyone who didn’t agree with her attempts to reorganise the department, despite the fact that she was trying to save it from closure.
Would Callum be the one to break the ice and show her what it was to be a warm, loving woman?
With best wishes
Joanna Neil
When JOANNA NEIL discovered Mills & Boon®, her lifelong addiction to reading crystallised into an exciting new career writing Medical™ Romance. Her characters are probably the outcome of her varied lifestyle, which includes working as a clerk, typist, nurse and infant teacher. She enjoys dressmaking and cooking at her Leicestershire home. Her family includes a husband, son and daughter, an exuberant yellow Labrador and two slightly crazed cockatiels. She currently works with a team of tutors at her local education centre, to provide creative writing workshops for people interested in exploring their own writing ambitions.
‘LOOK how many strawberries I picked,’ seven-year-old Sarah announced, coming into the kitchen. She placed a wicker basket on the table, filled to the brim with fruit. ‘There’s loads,’ she said, her blue eyes bright with excitement. ‘Can we have some for breakfast?’
Alex looked at the lush fruit. ‘Yes,’ she murmured, ‘of course…and as there’s such a lot, perhaps we ought to take some round to Mrs Marchant next door? I’ve noticed she’s usually up and about at this time of the morning.’
Sarah nodded. ‘I’ll go, if you like.’ She smiled. ‘I like Mrs Marchant. She’s kind…but I think she must be quite old, you know, or poorly? She always looks a bit tired and sometimes she says she has to go and sit down for a while…but she’s always nice. She gave me some toffees when I took the magazine round there yesterday.’
‘I want to take the strawberries,’ five-year-old James chimed in, his eyes lighting up at the mention of toffees. ‘You went last time.’ He glared at his sister and began to tug at the basket.
Sensing impending disaster, Alex intervened. ‘We’ll all go,’ she said, taking hold of the basket and moving it from harm’s way. ‘Now, finish your breakfast, both of you. We don’t have much time before we have to leave for school. And you need to go back upstairs to your bedroom and find your PE kit, James.’
‘I don’t like that bedroom,’ James complained, scowling at Alex across the kitchen table, a lock of brown hair falling across his forehead. ‘It’s too small. Why can’t I have the room with the window seat?’
‘Because we talked about this…’ Alex murmured. ‘And you chose the one that looked out over the orchard.’ She inspected the contents of his lunch box and then clipped the lid in place.
‘So?’ He hunched his shoulders. ‘That doesn’t matter, does it? I changed my mind. I can swap with Sarah.’
‘No, you can’t.’ His sister batted that one away before the idea could take root, her fair hair quivering with indignation. ‘I want the one where I can see the garden…I chose it…and I picked the colours and Auntie Alex has already started painting the walls for me. So it’s mine.’
‘Perhaps we can rearrange the furniture in your room to make it better for you,’ Alex said, glancing at James. She pushed his lunch box into his school bag and closed the zipper. ‘I made you egg mayonnaise sandwiches, and there are cracker biscuits with ham and cheese. And don’t forget to screw the lid tight on your drink bottle when you use it, or we’ll have another mess in your bag like the one we had last week.’
‘I don’t like egg maynaze.’ James’s chin jutted and his grey eyes took on a mutinous glint.
Alex held back the sigh that had started to build up in her chest. She raised dark brows. ‘You told me it was your favourite.’
He gave her a disdainful glance. ‘That was yesterday. Today I like peanut butter.’
‘Well, I’m sorry about that, James, but I really don’t have time to start over.’ Alex flicked back her long chestnut hair so that it settled in a gentle flurry across her shoulders, and handed him the bag. ‘We have to get you and Sarah to school, and I have to go to work.’ She checked her watch. ‘Do you remember what I told you? This is my first day in the new job, and I need to be at the hospital on time.’
‘Will you be in trouble if you’re late?’ Sarah’s anxiety sounded in her voice. ‘Mummy said she always got an ear bending from the boss if she wasn’t at work for nine o’clock.’ She frowned. ‘I think that must hurt a lot. I wouldn’t like it if it anyone pulled my ears.’
‘How could that happen to Auntie Alex?’ James said in a scornful tone. ‘She’s the boss. She can do what she likes.’
Alex smiled. ‘Not exactly, James. There are several bosses in my department…but the fact is, if you’re in charge you need to lead by example…show people the right way of doing things…so it’s even more important that I get there on time.’
Sarah’s face still bore a worried expression, so she added gently, ‘Ear bending just means the boss would talk to your mother about where she was going wrong.’
‘Really?’ Sarah’s blue eyes brightened. ‘Well, I think he must be sorry, anyway, ‘cos he sent Mummy some flowers. There was a card, and it said, Get well soon.’
She frowned again, and Alex gave her a hug. ‘We all hope for that, Sarah. At least your mum and dad are in good hands. They’re being looked after by the very best doctors.’
For once, James had nothing to say, and Alex sent him a quick, thoughtful glance. He seemed to be coping well enough in the aftermath of his parents’ accident, but she suspected his newfound belligerence was all tied up with what had been going on in his life this last few weeks. She would have to keep a keen eye on both children for the foreseeable future.
A few minutes later they left the house and went next door. It was a minute or so before Jane Marchant answered Alex’s knock, but when she did her smile was welcoming and she invited them inside.
‘We can only stop for a minute or two,’ Alex said, following her neighbour into the neat, pine kitchen. ‘We just wanted to bring you these strawberries, and to make sure that you’re all right.’
Jane stared at the fruit, her mouth dropping open in awe. ‘Just look at that fruit—so ripe and juicy.’ Her eyes glimmered with appreciation. ‘I’ll enjoy those with my tea—and I could make a lovely strawberry sponge cake. You’ll have to come and share it with me.’ She looked at the children, who nodded with enthusiasm at the suggestion. ‘Thank you for this,’ she said, embracing all three of them with her smile. ‘It was very thoughtful of you.’
‘Just don’t go overdoing it,’ Alex warned her. ‘I know what you’re like when you get started with the baking. I’ve been worried about you just lately, especially after that dizzy spell you had the other day. Are you still getting the headaches?’
Jane nodded. ‘But you don’t need to worry yourself over me, love. I’ll be fine. Like I said, the doctor’s been trying me with different tablets to see if we can calm things down. I probably just need to take things more slowly, that’s all. I’ve perhaps done too much in the garden. I’ve been trying to tackle the weeds—you know yourself what a job that can be when you have an acre or so to look after.’
‘I do.’ Alex’s lips made a downward curve. ‘I’m still wondering what possessed me to take on that rundown house next door, with its dilapidated orchard and all those outbuildings.’ Her mouth flattened. ‘It just seemed like a good idea at the time.’
‘I love it,’ Sarah said. ‘The garden’s all wild and raggedy, and there’s lots of fruit bushes all tangled up. And there’s masses of strawberries…’ she made a wide circle with her arms ‘.just spreading out all over the place.’
‘It’s like a jungle,’ James put in, ignoring Alex’s faintly amused groan. ‘We can play explorers, hunting the bad people.’ He began to make swashbuckling moves with an imaginary sword.
Sarah looked at Jane once more. ‘I can help you with the garden,’ she offered. ‘Any time you like.’
‘Thank you, sweetheart.’ Jane beamed at the little girl. ‘You’re a treasure. Alex must be so happy to have you with her.’
‘It’s true,’ Alex agreed. ‘Both she and James have been good as gold, helping with the move.’ She frowned. ‘But as far as your tablets are concerned, I’m not so sure that they’re doing the job.’ She glanced at Jane. Her neighbour was in her early sixties, a slender woman with brown, wavy hair and pale features. As Sarah had pointed out in her innocent way, she didn’t look at all well. ‘I really think you ought to go back to your doctor and ask him to do some tests to find out if there’s a specific cause of the high blood pressure that might have been overlooked—especially since you’re having other symptoms, like the back pain and the muscle spasms.’
Jane looked doubtful. ‘I really don’t like to bother the doctor any more. I’ve already been back several times and he’s doing what he can to keep everything in check.’
‘Even so,’ Alex commented, ‘as a doctor myself, I think your symptoms need to be looked into a bit more. I worry about leaving you on your own during the day while I’m at work. Is there no one in the family who can come and look out for you?’
Jane shook her head. ‘There’s only my nephew. We’re very close—in fact, he’s more like a son to me. His parents, my brother and his wife, are out of the country, working on various projects.’ Her features softened. ‘He’s such a lovely young man. I think the world of him…and he comes to visit whenever he’s able. We often talk on the phone. I’m sure he’d do anything for me, but I know he’s busy and I don’t want to burden him with my problems.’
Alex’s brows drew together. ‘Maybe you should think twice about that—after all, he’d want to know if you were ill, wouldn’t he?’
‘Of course, but it won’t come to that. I’ll be fine. Besides, he has enough troubles of his own to deal with right now…’ She pulled a face ‘There’s to be some kind of audit at work, apparently, and he has to figure out how to keep the chiefs off his back. He says they’ve appointed a new manager to whip the department into shape, and the last thing he needs is some busybody poking his nose into all the corners to see how they do things and then use it against him to turn all his carefully organised systems upside down.’
Alex’s eyes widened a fraction, and she let out a small breath. Managers were never popular. ‘I see what you mean…he does seem to have a lot on his plate at the moment, doesn’t he? But I think you’re more important than any of that. I wonder if he could find time to help occasionally…with the garden, maybe?’
‘Oh, he does what he can.’
James was beginning to show signs of restlessness, wandering about the room, peering at all the fine porcelain plates and glassware on display. He ran his fingers over the smooth lines of a ceramic cookie jar and then began to reach for a chicken-shaped timer, intent on examining its flamboyant red comb and wattles.
‘I think it’s time we made tracks,’ Alex murmured, stopping to give Jane a quick hug. She’d only known this woman for a couple of weeks, but already it was as though they’d been friends for a lifetime.
‘Let’s go,’ she said, handing Sarah her school bag. ‘With any luck we’ll get to school before the first whistle goes.’
Jane went with them into the hall. ‘See you later,’ she said.
‘I don’t like school,’ James began as Alex shepherded them out through the front door. ‘Mrs Coleman won’t let me do painting. She made me sit in the reading corner instead. I don’t like reading…’
He was still complaining as Alex bundled them into the car. ‘It’s a shame you’re not happy, James, but it’s nearly the end of term, you know, and you’ll be able to look forward to the summer holidays.’ She glanced at him. ‘Fasten your seat belt. You know, if you want to paint, you have to remember to keep your brushes to yourself and resist the temptation to daub the other children. Mrs Coleman said she’d explained it to you. Perhaps you could tell her that you’ll be sensible if she’ll let you have another go.’
‘Yes—well, I don’t like her, either.’ James clamped his lips together and squinted at the road ahead through narrowed eyes.
Alex checked that Sarah was safely installed in the back seat with a good space between her and her brother, and then drove towards the school. It was about a mile away from the house, along a winding country lane, and the drive was a pleasant one, though even that was not enough to calm her increasingly stretched nerves.
Had she taken on too much, making the decision to look after her brother’s children? In itself, it shouldn’t have been too difficult, but alongside the new job at Oakdale Hospital, and adding in the fact that she’d had to move to Somerset to be close to where they used to live, the stress was beginning to pile up. Her once calm and orderly life had been turned upside down. Everything was chaotic.
Not that there was much she could do about any of it. The car accident that had injured her brother and his wife had wreaked havoc with all their lives.
‘Bye,’ she said when they arrived at the school. ‘Take care. Be good.’ She kissed the children and hugged them and then watched for a minute or two as they met up with friends and went to stand in line for their teachers.
Then she headed back along the main road to town and her new place of work. The hospital was a few miles inland from the sea, and she drove towards it now, past the soft, rolling hills of the Quantocks, their slopes richly carpeted with heather and occasional dark oases of green woodland.
At the hospital, she parked in her designated place, and then made her way to the A and E department. She pulled in a deep breath, straightened her shoulders and walked into the main reception area. This was a new challenge, a difficult task that she’d been assigned, and she would need to have her wits about her. She was a little apprehensive about what lay in store, but she was determined to make the best effort she could.
Her first impression of the unit was a pleasant one. Everything seemed relatively calm in there. The treatment rooms were occupied, with patients being tended by medical staff, and the whiteboard showed the status of admissions and stage of treatment.
Across the room, a doctor was standing by the desk, chatting to nurses, until, after a moment or two, he noticed Alex and came over to her. He was good looking, long and lean, immaculately dressed in dark trousers and a white, self-striped shirt, finished off with a muted tie in a pale shade of blue.
‘Hi, there,’ he said. ‘Can I help you? I guess you’re not a patient, or you’d have been directed to the waiting room.’ His voice was easy on the ear, deep and well modulated, and there was a warmth about him that made it seem as though he was genuinely interested in her. He had black hair, cut short to frame his angular features, and his eyes were a vivid blue, alert and enquiring.
‘That’s right. Yes, thank you, I’m looking for…’ she checked his name badge ‘.Dr Brooksby.’ She smiled. ‘I believe I’ve found the very man I want.’
He laughed. ‘Well, that’s not something I get to hear every day…but more than welcome, all the same, coming from someone who looks as good as you.’ His glance shimmered over her, taking in the tailored, dove-grey suit she was wearing, with the pencil-slim skirt and the jacket that nipped in at her slender waist. His gaze came to rest on the burnished, silky swathe of her hair, lingering there for a while longer than was absolutely necessary.
‘Anything I can do for you, you only have to say.’ His manner was open and friendly, his blue eyes quizzical, inviting her to offload any worries or problems she might have.
‘That’s very kind of you.’ She let her glance roam fleetingly around the department. ‘I must say, it’s good to come to an A and E unit and find the atmosphere so relaxed and easygoing. That must be quite unusual, or perhaps I’ve come at a particularly quiet time? Either way, I imagine your bosses must be pleased with the way you run things around here.’
‘You’d think so, but actually they’re bringing in new management. And as to being quiet, it only appears that way—we’ve just finished dealing with the aftermath of a road accident, and now we’re taking a breather and making the most of things…before the new manager comes along to sort us out and tell us where we’ve been going wrong.’ His mouth made a rueful slant. ‘Sorry to offload that way. It’s a sore point. He’s supposed to put in an appearance some time today so we’re all on tenterhooks.’
A small ripple of dismay ran through her. This was definitely not going to be an easy ride, judging by his comments. ‘Oh, I see.’ She reflected on what he’d said for a second or two, before venturing, ‘Maybe he’ll find that everything’s perfectly in order?’
‘What a refreshing idea.’ He gave a wry smile. ‘Unfortunately, I very much doubt it. He’s a bean-counter, sent to trim us to the bone. This is the NHS, after all.’ He pressed his well-shaped lips together briefly. ‘Enough of my problems, though. What can I do for you, Miss…?’
‘It’s Dr,’ she answered carefully. ‘Dr Draycott. Alex.’
He stared at her, his mouth dropping open a little until he recovered himself. ‘Alex Draycott?’ he repeated, cautiously.
She nodded. ‘That’s right.’ She studied him. ‘You look as though you’re taken aback by that. Is something wrong?’
Slowly, he shook his head. ‘No, not at all. It’s just that…well…you’re a woman.’
She smiled. ‘That’s very observant of you.’
He was still staring, and she prompted gently, ‘Is that likely to be a problem for you?’
‘Uh…No, of course not. It’s just that, well, Alex is a man’s name, isn’t it? We were expecting a man.’ He frowned, looking at her in a slightly accusatory fashion. ‘And I thought you were maybe a relative concerned about one of our patients.’
‘I’m not.’
‘No, I see that now.’ His frown deepened. ‘So you’re the new doctor/manager who’s come to join the unit?’
She hesitated. ‘Um…bean-counter was how you put it, I think.’ She gave him a wryly amused look, her grey eyes taking in his obvious unease. ‘It’s odd how defensive people become whenever managers arrive on the scene, isn’t it? And it’s totally unnecessary, you know—after all, we’re all in this together, aren’t we, working for the greater good of the hospital? I have a job to do, but it doesn’t have to put us at odds with one another.’
‘Doesn’t it?’ He appeared sceptical. ‘Perhaps you aren’t aware that your reputation has gone before you? We’ve all heard how you wielded the axe at your last hospital. There were job cuts and ward closures.’
She sent him a quick look, her grey eyes troubled. ‘Sometimes, no matter how you try to preserve what’s already in place, it becomes impossible in the end, if budget restrictions are too tight. But in all fairness to me, I did manage to keep the department open, I kept the job losses down to natural wastage, and I put new measures in place so that some patients could be tended to elsewhere.’
‘You didn’t stay around, though, did you, once your job was done?’ His blue gaze was flint sharp. ‘Was that because you found the atmosphere suddenly less friendly?’
The attack was swift and unexpected and Alex felt a knot tighten in her stomach. ‘I left for personal reasons,’ she said, a catch in her voice. ‘It was nothing to do with the job. My circumstances changed, and my contract had come to an end anyway. I chose not to renew it.’ Even the memory of that time, when she had first heard about her brother’s accident, was enough to make the blood drain from her face.
He studied her thoughtfully, and perhaps he realised that he had touched a nerve, because he said softly, ‘I’m sorry. That was uncalled-for on my part. Put it down to tension, if you will. We’re all a little on edge here, uncertain about what the future holds for us and for the department. Of course, you were just doing your job.’
He laid a hand lightly on her elbow. ‘Perhaps I should take you along to the doctors’ lounge and offer you a cup of coffee? It was thoughtless of me not to suggest it before. It’s just that your arrival threw me off balance for a minute or two. We weren’t expecting you until later this morning.’
‘No, I realise that…but I thought it would be as well to come in early and get the feel of the place.’
‘I expect I would have done the same,’ he said, leading the way along the corridor to the lounge. ‘I think you’ll like it here. Everyone’s very friendly, and we work well together for the most part. The only real problem is the one that faces all hospital trusts. We’re struggling with budget deficits and the department is under threat of being closed down. Dr Langton, the chief executive, has been warning us that it’s a possibility.’
Alex frowned as they entered the room. ‘I was appointed by the board to try to make sure that doesn’t happen.’
His mouth made a wry twist. ‘Well, let’s hope you can work wonders. It’s a difficult job you’ve taken on, and in some ways management can turn out to be a poisoned chalice. Not many would want to do it.’
‘I suppose not.’ She was thoughtful for a moment or two. ‘But in all the years I’ve worked as a doctor, I’ve come across things that aren’t working as well as they should, and over time I began to think that perhaps if I went into management, I might be able to make a difference.’
‘You’ve obviously put a lot of thought into it. For myself, I prefer hands-on medicine one hundred per cent of the time.’
‘And I’m sure that must be the reason you’ve done so well for yourself. I’ve heard nothing but good things about you, from the occasional article in the press and the medical journals, as well as from Dr Langton. You’ve been at Oakdale for some time, haven’t you?’
‘Yes, for several years. I came here originally as a registrar and then I was offered the post of consultant. I love it here…it’s like a home from home for me.’ He grinned. ‘Mind you, I think medicine’s in my blood. It’s been there ever since I was a child, pretending to be an army surgeon to my wounded toy soldiers.’
She laughed softly, trying to imagine him as a youngster. ‘I can see you in my mind’s eye,’ she said, ‘bandaging your action figures. Though I expect most boys wouldn’t bother too much with those who’d been invalided out.’ Still, even James had made a crutch for a toy soldier that had lost its plastic leg, painstakingly taping the wooden stick to its hand.
He made a wry smile. ‘Maybe not.’ He went over to the coffee machine to one side of the room and poured hot liquid into two mugs. ‘Do you take milk and sugar?’ he asked, and she nodded.
‘Both, thanks.’ She sniffed the air appreciatively. ‘That smells good.’
He nodded. ‘It’s one thing I look forward to around here. Decent coffee.’ He waved her to a chair. ‘Have a seat and make yourself comfortable.’ He came to sit close to her and swallowed his coffee, savouring the taste and taking a moment to relax. ‘So, tell me about yourself,’ he said quietly, his glance moving over her and coming to rest briefly on the smooth shapeliness of her long legs. ‘From what I heard, you’ve moved here from Herefordshire? I suppose that means this job must have had some special appeal for you?’
‘I thought it would give me the best of both worlds, the chance to work in paediatric emergency, which is what I like doing best—it’s what I specialised in—and at the same time it allows me to take on a managerial role.’ She clasped her cup in both hands, feeling the comforting warmth spread slowly through her. ‘But the main reason I’m here is because I have family who have settled in Somerset.’
‘Your parents?’
She shook her head. ‘My brother and his family. My parents do have a home here, but they’re away at the moment, because of my father’s job. He’s a troubleshooter for an oil company, so he tends to travel a lot.’
He gave a brief smile. ‘That’s something we have in common, then. My parents have always travelled far and wide, as far back as I can remember.’ A fleeting sadness came into his eyes and she studied him thoughtfully for a moment or two. Had that been a problem for him?
‘Perhaps I’ve been lucky,’ she murmured. ‘My parents were always there for me while I was growing up. It was only when I started work as a doctor that they began to travel further afield.’ She would have liked to ask him about his family, but something warned her that this might be the wrong time to do that. She didn’t want to blunder into areas that might cause problems, especially on her first day. Perhaps when she knew him a little better.
‘It must have been difficult for you, uprooting yourself,’ he said. ‘Did you manage to find a place of your own, or are you renting while you look around?’
‘I thought about renting. Back in Herefordshire I’d taken out a lease on a flat, but it ran out—another reason why it seemed feasible to make the move to Somerset. I planned to do the same down here, but then I saw this big, old house on the market, going for a song, and I decided to snap it up. It was purely an impulsive action—not like me at all, but something about it appealed to me. Of course, the reason it was going so cheap is because it needs a lot of work…’ She pulled a face. ‘And the owner wanted a quick sale.’
‘But things are working out fairly well for you, overall?’
She nodded. ‘I think so. I hope so.’ She drank her coffee and looked around. ‘As I see it right now, though, my biggest challenge is going to be this job. According to Dr Langton, the hospital is deep in debt and the accident and emergency department is at risk. I want to do all I can to keep it safe, but it means taking some measures that might not be all that popular.’
She braced herself. ‘In fact, I think I ought to make a start on getting to grips with the job right now—it’s been good to spend a few minutes in here, and I appreciate you taking a break and having coffee with me, but perhaps now I should start to familiarise myself with the way things work around here.’ She glanced at him. ‘Mr Langton suggested you might be available this morning to give me an insight into the way you run things—where and when you use agency staff, for instance—and perhaps you could let me see your drugs list, so I can gain some idea of expenditure in that area?’
He frowned. ‘Are you sure you want to do that on your first day? Wouldn’t you prefer to take a general look around and get to know some of the staff? I’m sure they’re all anxious to meet their new colleague.’
She nodded. ‘Of course, and I want to meet them, but I don’t want to intrude on them while they’re busy. I’ll definitely make time to introduce myself to them through the course of the day. For the moment, though, I think it would be better if I were to spend time with you…going through the workings of the department.’
‘Hmm…yes…’ He seemed to be distracted all at once, and glanced at the watch on his wrist. ‘Unfortunately, I have an emergency to attend,’ he said, getting to his feet. ‘So I’m afraid you’ll have to forgive me. Maybe we could get together some other time?’
She frowned. ‘But I understood that you would be free from clinical duties this morning for a couple of hours. Is that not so?’
He nodded. ‘But then this emergency came up…a thoracic injury, flail chest. He should be coming back from Radiology any time now.’
Alex stood up. ‘But I was really hoping to make a start…’
‘Of course. I appreciate that, but, you know, I don’t actually have the figures you want right at this moment…you’ve caught me on the hop a bit there, and I really do have to go and check on my patient.’ He gave her an encouraging smile. ‘Perhaps it would be best if you go and find our registrar. He’ll help guide you around the department. Ask him anything you want to know. He’ll be only too happy to help you.’
‘But I…’ Alex gazed at him in confusion.
‘I’m sure you’ll soon have all the information you want.’ He laid his hands on her shoulders, his grasp gentle, his fingers warm and strong, causing a ripple of heat to flow through her. It was odd, but all at once, as he held her, she became strangely conscious of her femininity. It was confusing. She was so used to taking charge, of being in control, and yet with just one simple act he had made her overwhelmingly conscious of his powerful masculinity.