A Chinese cookbook for happiness and success

A Chinese cookbook for happiness and success

published by: epubli GmbH, Berlin, www.epubli.de

Copyright: © 2014 Nadine Koerner

ISBN 978-3-8442-8027-2

1. Introduction

1.1 Why a Chinese cookbook for happiness and success and why you need it.

How happy were you on March 20

th

 this year?

You were very happy? Great, thank God, you don’t need to continue reading this book.

Not overtly happy for some reasons? Keep on reading.

You cannot recall any specific feelings from the 20th of March at all?

Keep on reading and please note that the United Nations has named the 20 March the International Day of Happiness!

Taking this as a reason to reflect, on 20

th

 of March I walked along the Bijiang River in Shunde, South China. About 6.35 am, the sun rose, painting the sky from soft red, pink, orange to a warm yellow, creating a magnificent, nearly magical moment. A Chinese man with long grey beard in a white sleeveless shirt and wide grey trousers, washed or faded out, practiced Tai Chi along the river, smiling all the time. He seemed completely happy and at peace with himself and the world - like so many Chinese people I had watched when they were doing their morning exercises along the river. I smiled at him, caught his eyes, smiled and went closer. Why did he seem to be so happy, was he really so happy?

He gave me an even bigger smile. So I took all my courage and asked: “Sorry to interrupt you, but you seem to be very happy…!”

He continued moving slowly, gently, and apparently effortlessly and answered: ‘Happy? Of course I am happy!”

So I asked again: “Sorry again, why you are so happy and what actually does happiness mean to you?”

A fresh breeze came along from the river and the leaves of the palm trees along the river moved like to a fine music.

Calmly the man answered: “See, I have everything I need. Happiness is just like this: the cat has fish to eat and the dog has bones to gnaw. A dog should not hunt for the fish and the cat should not look for bones and they will always be happy.’

I nodded and replied: “Sorry again, but what is it then that we should look for?”

The man replied: ‘Well, most people look for money and other possessions, equaled with success and happiness. These are the unhappy people. If you truly want to be happy, remember that happiness and success are what you define them to be.”

Then he paused for a second, took a deep breath and continued: “as for me, it is to practice here every morning and be one with nature.’

If you were not overtly happy on March 20

th

 or most other days of the year, it is time to pause and reflect.

It is well true that most people strive for money, career, fame, villas, and fancy cars, because they correlate those ‘things’ with success. And in their mind, once they are successful, they will be happy. Are you one of those people? Is it really like that? And what is it exactly, that makes you happy?

For most Chinese people, food is one of the keys to happiness; this is described by the philosopher and writer Lin Yutang, who lived from 1895 till 1976: “How a Chinese spirit glows over a good feast! How apt is he to cry out that life is beautiful when his stomach and his intestines are well filled! From this well filled stomach suffuses and radiates a happiness that is spiritual…”

 Similarly, the Taiwanese archeologist and sinologist Chang brought to attention that “Chinese people are especially preoccupied with food” and “food is at the center of, or at least it accompanies or symbolizes, many social interactions.”

Interestingly there is also a Vietnamese saying that “happiness is eating Chinese food, having a Japanese wife and living in a Western house.”

That food is directly linked to happiness in China can be noticed during Chinese New Year, when foods are eaten, which symbolise happiness and good fortune like small shrimps and fish. Besides that food has been linked to happiness and success in China for a long time already, China is also one of the few countries, where the government actively seeks measures to increase happiness levels of the people (see chapter 2.4)

Consequently there are many good reasons to learn more about Chinese cuisine and cooking.

But why do you need THIS cookbook?

For most people, cooking is an every day activity and necessity, which takes time. Most cookbooks teach you only one thing: how to cook food. THIS book teaches you how to cook and how to

use the time you spend on cooking for enhancing your happiness and success at the same time

! In addition, this book helps you to:

 apprehend what happiness for you is and what you need to be happy - and thus promote your happiness

 become conscious what success means for you and in which areas you want to be successful – and thus promote your success

 find out the reasons why you are not as happy or successful as you might want to be and show solutions

 cook delicious, easy and healthy Chinese recipes

 release stress, as cooking is a proven ‘stress-reliever’

 keeps you in the moment and shifts your attention from worries to recipes for happy and successful living

 and thus enhance not only your happiness and success but your overall long-term well-being, the secret to a long and fulfilled life.

1.2 The definition of happiness and success around the world

Ask a hundred people what happiness is and you get a hundred answers. Therefore one of the greatest challenges in the study of happiness lies in its definition. Happiness can be seen as a vast umbrella term that can mean different things to different people. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, happiness is defined as either

good fortune in the sense of prosperity

 or as

a state of well-being and contentment in the sense of joy or as a pleasurable or satisfying experience

.

In psychology, happiness is often comprehended in three ways—as a hedonic state, a cognitive state, or a general life philosophy. Happiness then can refer to a way of thinking, such as being optimistic; a way of feeling joy, pleasure, relief, or gratitude; or simply a way of being. Most definitions in psychology include ‘a predominance of positive over negative affect’ and ‘satisfaction with life as a whole’. Other disciplines and people make a clearer distinction between the concept of happiness and the positive emotions the word describes. Happiness in that way can be simply drive reduction. It’s as if you’re driving down the highway and your stomach is growling. You see a McDonald’s drive-in, pull over and order a double cheeseburger and a McFlurry. That makes you ‘happy’. Well for a moment, the moment you are eating. But that satisfaction is fleeting—the resultant heartburn likely lasts longer than your gratification. Thus, happiness is a conscious state of mind, entrenched in the neo-cortex, the region of the brain responsible for planning, decision–making and thinking. So you eat a double cheeseburger and think, “Oh man, I feel good, I am happy now.”

When analyzing dictionary definitions of happiness from different nations, it turns out that the most frequent definition of happiness highlights good luck and favorable external conditions, as in the case of estimated 80 % of nations. However, luck didn’t factor into the modern conception of happiness in Spain, Argentina, Ecuador, India, and Kenya.

In American English, happiness means favorable

internal

 conditions like feelings and studies show that many young Americans associate happiness with excitement, while older generations link it with comforting, peaceful emotions. For North Americans and Europeans, happiness tends to be defined in terms of personal achievement and happiness is said to correlate with self-esteem. For East Asians on the other side, happiness tends to be defined in terms of interpersonal connectedness and happiness is best predicted by how well embedded the self is in a social network.

And now the good news: no matter how one defines happiness, it is limitless. Just as someone’s bad mood can be passed on, happiness may be a collective phenomenon too. So having a happy friend, who lives within a mile of you, appears to increase the probability that you will be happy as well. Just as some diseases are contagious, happiness can be too.

Also, success, just like happiness, means different things to different people. Consequently there is no clear-cut, universal definition of success.

Some define it through quantifiable constant self-improvements over skill sets, scientific knowledge and progressive self-development. Some define it by how much money they make. Others define it by their career path and corresponding title.

From its Latin origin the word ‘success’ actually means "to advance" or "to progress" which implies that success is not "something" you get at the end, but a process that has very little to do with the end result. From this point of view success is what will improve your life as it is what moves you forward to a better experience of life.

And it is up to you what kind of experience you want out of life.

You are in the driver seat. You are the cook in the kitchen. So choose the right recipe for your own happiness and success.

1.3 Following the trend towards sustainability: Sustainable happiness and success

For most people, happiness is just like a single sun ray, passing quickly. Sustainable happiness, however, is happiness that lasts, not only seconds, minutes, but for every day. That is what most people want. Happiness forever after… as it is so nicely superimposed in so many fairy tales. In positive psychology this is illustrated in a formula as:

H = S + C + V

This means: enduring/sustainable Happiness (H) = Set Point (S) + Circumstances (C) + factors under Voluntary Control (V).

The happiness set point refers to the situation when nothing extremely happy or sad happens, it is determined to some degree by our genes. According to researchers, the set points makes up 50% of our happiness, while circumstances 10% and factors under voluntary control, meaning the activities we choose to do, make up 40%. Consequently, in order to increase happiness and step towards sustainable happiness it is necessary to have some recipes to raise the set point and influence the factors under voluntary control positively, which means choosing activities which contribute to our happiness! Only 10 % of our happiness might be out of our control, so it is up to us to be happy, it is our choice! So if you want happiness to be sustainable and ‘forever after’, you have to make it to your predominant state of mind, which can be achieved by changing your overall attitude with the help of the recipes in chapter 4.

When it comes to success, most people lose sight of the real reason why they actually want to be successful. Many assume, once they get all those ‘things’, referred to as ‘status symbols’ or ‘success symbols’, like a penthouse in Manhattan, a yacht in Miami Beach and a Ferrari in their garage, they can consider themselves as successful and then they will feel happy! Well… for a short time. Until a friend has got a newer and bigger yacht and the Ferrari has got scratches making it look second-hand. Surely most of your desires will be obtainable within your lifetime but this no guarantee that you will be happy and fulfilled. Therefore it is necessary to strive for sustainable success.

What is sustainable success? Sustainable success is inexhaustible and consistent. For you to have success that is sustainable you have to develop a new mindset to focus on what you must become to attract that which you want. That means you can either obtain success or you can become it. The mindset is very different, because adopting the mentality of creating lasting success, of becoming sustainable,

starts with realizing that success is a feeling

! Yes, success is actually one kind of feeling. So when you are making that feeling part of who you are, especially with help of the recipes in chapter 4.3 and 4.4, you will never be without success again.

1.4 The relationship between happiness and success

When it comes to the relationship between happiness and success, most people assume that success leads to happiness. There are quite a lot of ancient stories from Asia about happiness and success and one of them goes like this:

A woman came out of her home and saw three old men with long beards who sat before her garden. She did not know them and said:

—I don’t think I know you, but you may be hungry, so please come in and have something to eat.

They asked:

—Is the man of the house there? —No, she answered, he is not yet here. -Then we cannot enter, they said.

In the evening, when the husband arrived, she told him what happened.

—Tell them that I already arrived and invite them to come in’, said her husband.

The woman came out to invite the men to enter her house and be their guests.

—We cannot enter a house the three together, answered the old men. —Why?, she wanted to know.

One of the men pointed to other of his friends and explained:

—His name is Wealth. Then pointing to the other one: —His name is Success and I am called Love. Now go in and decide with your husband which one of the three you wish to invite to your home.

The woman entered her home and told her husband what they said. The man became happy:

—How good! Le us invite Wealth, so that he enters and fills our home.

However his wife shook her head and disagreed:

—Dear, why don't we invite Success?

The couple's daughter was listening from the other corner of the house and came running:

—Wouldn't it be better to invite Love? Our home would then be full of love. —The husband nodded: Good, let’s take our daughter's advice into account, go out and invite Love to be our guest.

The wife came out and asked:

—Which one of you is Love? Please come in and be our guest.

Love stood up and started to walk towards the house. The other ones stood up and followed. Surprised the lady asked Wealth and Success:

—I invited only Love, why do you too come in?

The old men answered together:

—If you had invited Wealth or Success the other ones would have stayed outside, but since you invited Love, where he goes, we also go with him. Wherever there is love, there is also wealth and success.

The discussion about the relationship between happiness and success goes on. Most people want to be successful in life. And of course, everyone wants to be happy. When it comes to the pursuit of success and happiness, most people assume the same formula: ‘if I work hard, I will become successful, and once I become successful,

then

 I'll be happy.’ The only problem is that research in the field of positive psychology has proven that this formula is not correct. Success does not cause happiness.

It is rather like in the story above… love is the key to wealth and success, and so is happiness.

Happy people, all those who experience a predominance of positive emotions, tend to be successful and accomplished across various areas in life. Why? Simply because an individual experiencing a positive mood and emotion is usually encountering circumstances that he or she interprets as looked-for. In these circumstances, people are most likely to expand their resources and friendships and to take the opportunity to build their repertoire of skills for future use and work actively toward achieving new goals.

Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful

.

 ~A. Schweitzer

1.5 History of happiness and success definitions and research

Happiness can be seen as a function of space and time because the way happiness has been viewed and researched over the last few thousand years was constantly changing, depending on geographical area and time period.

The psychological and philosophical pursuit of happiness began nearly 2500 years ago in China with philosophers and teachers like Confucius, Mencius and in Greece with Socrates, and Aristotle. “The happy,” said Aristotle, “are the happy few.” Aristotle distinguished between happiness and amusement, as happiness could be achieved through contemplation, but amusement not. Socrates thought of happiness as something at least partially within one’s control, especially through the education of desire as key to happiness.

For most people at most times in human history, happiness was not something that one could expect to control. It was in the hands of the gods. It was dictated by fate or fortune and controlled by the stars. Consequently ordinary people could not count on making it for themselves. Happiness, literally, was what happened to one, and so to be happy was to be lucky. Even those who were lucky commonly expected a turn for the worse. In fact, in every European language, the root of the word for happiness is some older word that meant "luck". Most often the word happiness can be derived from

the Old Norse and Old English word "hap"

, and hap simply means "luck."

In medieval times, early Christians saw happiness as something a soul was to be rewarded with in heaven and not something attainable in the world of mortals. In the 13

th

 century St. Thomas Aquinas shed light on the role of human effort in the process of happiness which he regarded as becoming closer to God. He stated that partial happiness could be achieved in this life via “the ‘theological virtues’ of charity, hope, and faith”.

Then in the Renaissance, the definition and concept of happiness changed again and pleasure was equaled with happiness. The life question changed from ‘how to be saved’ to ‘how to be happy’. Already in 1776, by the time the American Declaration of Independence was written, the "pursuit of happiness" was declared an undeniable right, given by the creator. This was also the period in which the English philosopher and revolutionary John Locke declared that ‘the business of man is to be happy’. And it is also the period when Thomas Jefferson observes that “The pursuit of happiness is a self-evident truth.”

The first books and articles on happiness date back to the late 1800s. But the explicit concept and study of happiness appeared only in the 1940s, when the first surveys included questions related to happiness. However, only a few scientists studied happiness and related concepts at that time.

The first comprehensive review on the scientific research on “avowed happiness”, covering research mainly from the 1930s to the mid-1960s, appeared in Warner

Wilson’s book on the correlates of avowed happiness in 1967

.

 However, this review had a limited impact on the field, despite the fact that it was published in Psychological Bulletin, one of the most prestigious journals in psychology. Most psychologists at the time still believed, that happiness was something that could not be scientifically investigated. Nevertheless, the antagonism against the scientific study of happiness decreased with the cognitive revolution of the 1960s and 1970s, and in 1966 the famous Harvard Grant Study, which tracked hundreds of Harvard’s graduates for decades, was initiated.

In 1969,

Bradburn wrote an

 influential book on emotional well-being by introducing the new measure of positive and negative affect and showing the relative independence of positive and negative affect.

 Since then, the notion of

subjective well-being

 (SWB) has often been used in research literature as a substitute for the term ‘happiness'. SWB encompasses how people evaluate their own lives in terms of

cognitive

 and

affective

 explanations, and can be represented in the following way: SWB = SATISFACTION WITH LIFE + AFFECT. The first, cognitive part of subjective well-being is expressed by

life satisfaction

. Life satisfaction can be seen as one's assessment of one's own life. One is said to be satisfied when there is little or no discrepancy between the present situation and what is thought to be an ideal or deserved situation. On the other hand, dissatisfaction is a result of a considerable discrepancy or of comparing oneself with others.

Affect

 represents the emotional side of SWB. The notion of affect comprises both positive and negative moods and emotions that are associated with our daily experiences. The Bradburn Scale of psychological well-being, also known as the Affect Balance Scale, is made up of two components, the positive affect and the negative affect component, each having 5 items. The scale asks participants if, in the past few weeks, they have felt certain emotions. The participant answers ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to each question. The ‘no’ score is subtracted from the ‘yes‘ score to create a positive/negative affect difference score.

Several years later, in 1978, Philip Brickman and colleagues published a paper on hedonic adaptation, one of the most famous papers in the history of subjective well-being research. It reports the surprisingly small difference in self-reported happiness between