“Now, how about that tour I promised?” Sophie said.
Though Hannah’s life here started out a bit rocky, it seemed that things were taking a turn for the better.
Nine
It was after eleven o’clock when Phillip and Hannah returned to the palace. And most of that time he and Ethan spent holed up in the dining room discussing the proposed partnership. On the ride back, Hannah asked how it had gone and got a noncommittal shrug, but something must have gone right. When all was said and done, Phillip agreed to the proposal. Already plans were being made for him to tour several of the resort sites.
In fact, he would leave Sunday morning and wouldn’t return until Thursday evening, less than twenty-four hours before their nuptials.
“Does that upset you?” Phillip had asked her as they walked up to her suite.
She shook her head. It was business. And important. Besides, it was bad luck for the bride and groom to see each other right before the wedding. This would remove any temptation.
“It will make seeing each other on our wedding day that much more special,” she said. And that made him smile.
They reached her door, and though she’d planned to tell him good-night, kiss him and go inside alone, he asked, “Are you going to invite me in for a nightcap?”
It would probably be better if she didn’t, but it had turned out to be such a nice night, she hated to see it end just yet. “Can you promise to behave?”
He grinned. “Can you?”
God, she loved it when he teased her.
She opened the door. “Phillip, would you like to come in for a nightcap?”
“I would love to.” He followed her inside, shutting the door behind them.
Alone again. Five days ago she would have been a nervous wreck. Now she looked forward to the times they spent, just the two of them.
The room was dim, the only light from a small lamp in one corner of the room. She reached for the light switch by the door, but he intercepted her hand.
“I prefer it darker, if you don’t mind.” When she shot him a questioning look, he grinned and added, “Didn’t I tell you, I’m part vampire?”
If that was true, he could bite her neck anytime.
He crossed to the wet bar. “Brandy?”
“That sounds good.”
He poured two brandies while she took off her shoes and sweater.
Phillip sat on the sofa and when she sat down beside him, he looped an arm around her shoulder, drawing her close. For several minutes they just sat there, sipping their drinks in companionable silence. He was a warm, solid presence beside her, the stubble on his chin rough against her forehead. And he smelled so good. So…familiar.
Yet there was still so much about him she didn’t know. And that was okay, she realized. At first, she thought they should know one another completely before the wedding. Now she liked the idea of getting to know him gradually.
She set her drink down and curled closer, drawing her knees up and resting them over the tops of his thighs. She closed her eyes and laid her head on his chest, taking it all in. The way he felt, the way he smelled, the thump of his pulse against her cheek. The way his arms felt around her, the sensation that she was and would always be safe there.
She stored every second of it in her memory, so that when he was gone, she wouldn’t miss him as much. Or, who knows, maybe it would make her miss him even more.
After a while he gave her a little nudge. “Are you falling asleep on me?”
“Just thinking.”
“About what?”
“How many times I imagined us like this. What it would feel like.”
“How does it feel?”
She wrapped both arms around him and squeezed, feeling sleepy and content. “Wonderful. Perfect.”
He set his glass down beside hers. “Is that all you imagined?”
She grinned up at him, knowing exactly what he was suggesting. “Usually we were kissing.”
He cupped her chin and raised her face to his, brushed his lips across hers, and a purr of pleasure curled in her throat.
He lifted his head and looked down at her. “Like that?”
“Hmmm, just like that.”
He lowered his head and kissed her again, deeper this time. And longer. And she could feel herself beginning to melt. But something was different this time. As much as she wanted him, wanted to be close, she didn’t feel the urgency that was usually there. That soul-deep ache that seemed to push them too far, too fast.
Phillip must have felt the same way, because he took it slow. Kissing, touching. And she couldn’t get over how right it felt. The way they seemed to fit, to be completely in sync.
She wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but after a while he whispered against her lips, “It’s late. I should go.”
She pressed her cheek against his chest, felt his arms tighten around her. “I wish you could stay.”
“It won’t be long before I can.”
Reluctantly she uncurled herself from around him and climbed from his lap. He rose to his feet and offered a hand to help her up. At the door, he kissed her again, but what was meant to be a quick goodbye peck progressed to another ten minutes of kissing and touching.
When he finally pulled away, they were both a bit breathless.
“I really have to go,” he said. “I have a busy day tomorrow. And I’m sure you do, too.”
He was right. She let her arms fall from around his neck and backed away from the temptation. “Is there any way you could spare a few minutes tomorrow afternoon? The decorator will be here and I could show you the plans for the suite. I want to know what you think.”
“You’re free to do whatever you’d like.”
She appreciated his trust in her, but what she would appreciate more was his input. “I want to be sure you like it, too.”
He shrugged. “If it’s that important to you.”
“It is.”
“All right. I suppose, if the designer is adequate, it might be time that I redecorate my own suite.”
It took a second for his words to sink in, and a few more for their meaning to register. Then it made sense. She suddenly knew exactly why he didn’t care what she did with the suite. And it had nothing to do with trusting her taste.
It was of no consequence to him, because he wasn’t going to be living there.
There was something wrong.
Phillip could feel it. He could see it written clearly on Hannah’s face. Although for the life of him, he had no idea what it could be.
He had done everything right tonight. And, with the exception of the stunt Sophie pulled at dinner, it hadn’t been nearly as trying as he’d anticipated. In fact, being with Hannah wasn’t a hardship at all. He enjoyed her company.
Yet, as hard as he’d tried, she was still unhappy.
“What did I do?” he asked.
She blinked rapidly, as though surprised by his question. “Wh-what do you mean?”
Did she honestly think him so daft or self-centered that he wouldn’t notice when she was upset? “You have that look,” he said. “And I have the distinct impression I did or said something wrong.”
She shook her head, too emphatically to be believable, and plastered a smile on her face. “No. Of course not.”
He sighed. “Hannah, you’re a terrible liar.”
She bit her lip and lowered her eyes.
She wasn’t going to make this easy. She was going to make him drag it out of her. As long as he lived, he would never understand the inner workings of the female mind.
Fine then, if that was what she wanted. “Just tell me why you’re upset.”
“It’s really late, and I’m exhausted,” she said, but she wouldn’t look him in the eye.
He folded his arms across his chest. “I’m not leaving until you tell me what’s wrong.”
She glanced up at him, saw that he was serious. That he really wasn’t going anywhere. “It’s stupid.”
“Go on.”
“I thought… I just assumed…”
He waited patiently for her to continue.
She looked down at her hands, clenched in front of her, and said softly, “I thought that, after the wedding, we would be sharing a suite.”
He wasn’t sure what surprised him more, that she would want to share a suite, or that it upset her that they wouldn’t. Honestly, it had never crossed his mind. His parents had been married, yet they never shared living quarters. Maybe in her world, that was what married couples did.
But this was not going to be a typical marriage. She knew that going in and he wasn’t about to change his ways. “Hannah—”
“It’s okay. Really.”
Obviously it was not okay. He could see that she was trying to be tough, but her voice had that wobbly sound she got just before she cried. He was sorry she was hurt, but this was not negotiable. “This is the way things are. My parents conducted their marriage the same way and I intend to follow those rules.”
“I understand,” she said. But he could see that she didn’t. She was hurt and confused.
“I thought you knew coming into this that it was an arrangement. I’m sorry if this upsets you or you were misled about my intentions.” Hadn’t they determined, on more than one occasion, that he was the king, and he made the rules?
But that had been in jest. There was nothing funny about this.
She sniffled softly and swiped at her cheek. “I’m well aware of our arrangements. Just forget I said anything.”
It pained him to see her so distraught, and trying so hard to hide it. He wanted to say something, anything, to make her feel better, but the words escaped him. How did she manage, without even trying, to make him feel so helpless?
So…inadequate?
She took a deep breath and blew it out. “I’m sorry. I’m just tired.” She flashed him a smile that almost looked genuine. “I’m up way past my bedtime. Not to mention that it’s been a really crazy week.”
That it had. Both of their lives had been changed dramatically, but he had to remind himself that hers bore the brunt of it. It was just going to take time for them to adjust. And would it kill him to spare her just a little bit more of his time? At least until she settled in.
“Do you have plans for lunch tomorrow?” he asked.
“Nothing I can’t change.”
He had a ridiculously busy schedule, but he could spare some time if it kept the peace. “We could eat, then take a walk in the garden.”
Her smile grew. “I would love to.”
Though he felt ridiculous for it, the happiness that filled her eyes warmed his heart. “One o’clock?”
She nodded vigorously.
“It’s a date then.” He pressed one last lingering kiss to her lips, then opened the door. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow,” she said, before she closed the door behind him.
And as he walked to his own suite, he considered the events of the past week, since the minute she stepped out of that car and into his life. He knew she had prepared for her position as his wife, and it was clear she took it very seriously. It was her motivation that had him puzzled. Until she moved to Morgan Isle, he had been sure she’d done it for the title. For the security of her family. Yet she seemed to have every intention of making this marriage work.
She seemed to want the real thing.
But that was more than he was willing, or capable, of giving.
Friday came faster than Hannah could have imagined. Faster than she was ready for. She’d spent the past eight years preparing for this, and suddenly everything was happening so fast, she barely had time to catch her breath. And though she vowed not to let the living arrangements upset her, it had been in the back of her mind.
She was beginning to suspect that her ideas about her perfect life with Phillip, all her carefully mapped plans, were silly and immature. And for the most part, totally unrealistic.
She of all people should understand that life didn’t follow a plan. If it did, she never would have lost her father, and her mother wouldn’t be trying to replace him. She couldn’t expect Phillip to fall into line and live his life, one she knew virtually nothing about, by her preconceived notion of what a marriage was supposed to be.
But even if things didn’t go exactly as she planned, that didn’t mean she and Phillip wouldn’t be happy. It was just going to take time to figure things out, to get them running smoothly, and a lot of compromise. She would have to be patient with him.
Honestly, what did it say about his childhood that he’d never considered sharing a living space with his own wife? A person didn’t grow up like that without collecting scars along the way. She would have to be pretty coldhearted not to cut him some slack.
The more she thought about it over the course of the week, when she took the time to consider his feelings, more than being hurt, she felt sad. For him, because of the loving environment he deserved, and obviously never had. She would show him how unconditional love and dedication felt. No matter what it took.
Everything was going to work out all right.
She kept telling herself that all week as last-minute preparations were being made, and when her bridesmaids and mother arrived for the rehearsal luncheon Thursday afternoon.
She chanted it over and over during the final dress fittings, and later at the impromptu bridal dinner Sophie hosted at her residence. While everyone sipped champagne and shared stories of love and relationships, Hannah pasted on a smile to hide the fact that, for the first time since she made the decision to do this, she was questioning herself.
She even pretended, when her mother mentioned her own impending wedding, that she wasn’t horrified by the idea. And when everyone gushed over the palace and asked her if royal life was everything she had dreamed of, she told them yes. Because it was, or, it would be. At least she hoped so.
It was after midnight when everyone retired to their rooms, and Hannah was finally alone, with nothing but time to think about what she was doing. It wasn’t as if she could back out at this point. Not that she would even want to. She was just confused and scared.
What if she was making a mistake?
What she needed was a sign. She needed something to happen that would assure her she was doing the right thing.
She’d barely completed the thought when someone knocked on her door. Then she heard Phillip’s voice.
“Hannah, it’s me.”
She rushed to the door before he could open it. As desperately as she wanted to see him, with the wedding less than twenty-four hours away, she couldn’t. It would be bad luck and, honestly, she didn’t need another black cloud hanging over her head.
She opened the door a crack, and stood behind it, so she wouldn’t be tempted to look. “We can’t see each other.”
“I know,” he said, his tone hushed. “I just wanted to let you know that I’m back from the States. I didn’t want you to worry that I might be late for our wedding.”
“How was your trip?”
“Exhausting. I toured ten resorts in five days. I’m glad to be home.”
And she was glad he came home.
“I ran into Sophie downstairs. She said there was a bridal party tonight.”
“It was fun,” Hannah said. “It was nice to see all of my friends again. You’ll meet them tomorrow.”
“Sophie also said that she thought you might be upset about something.”
How could Sophie have known? Hannah had been so careful not to let it show. “Why would she think that?”
“I don’t know. But I wanted to make sure you’re okay.”
He was worried about her.
Though it was a small thing, for her, it meant so much. “I’m okay.”
“I’m glad,” he said. And she could hear that he was honestly relieved. “I worried you might be having second thoughts.”
Was he seriously thinking that she wouldn’t marry him? The idea that he could be even the slightest bit unsure made her feel a million times better. It made her realize that she wasn’t in this alone. “Are you?”
There was a pause, then an emphatic, “No. I’m not.”
She smiled. Neither was she any longer. “I’m not either.”
“I missed you,” he said. He sounded a little surprised. Like he hadn’t expected to miss her, but it just…happened.
This was it. This was her sign.
“I missed you, too,” she told him.
“I’m going to get to bed. I’ll see you tomorrow. Sleep well.”
“You, too.”
She heard his footsteps as he walked away, then she closed the door and leaned against it.
The sense of dread she had been feeling all week was suddenly gone. The gush of relief that replaced it was so swift and intense her knees nearly buckled. Tomorrow she’d be Queen Hannah Augustus Mead.
Ten
The next day rushed by in a blur. Hannah was so busy, she barely had a moment to be nervous. And only when the time came to walk down the aisle, did she feel a twinge of sadness. Her father should have been here to give her away. But because there was no one in the world who could ever take his place, she insisted walking it alone.
When she saw Phillip standing at the end of the white runner, stoic and regal in his dress uniform, she felt a dizzying mix of excitement and nerves. And as she walked toward him and their eyes connected—when she saw a smile tug at the corners of his mouth and a dance in the depths of his eyes—a deep feeling of peace washed over her.
The ceremony itself was over quickly, and when the priest introduced them as husband and wife, the guests cheered.
Photographs seemed to take forever, and by the time they were escorted to the ballroom, the reception was already in full swing. Dinner was served shortly after, then they covered all of the formalities like the cutting of the cake and the first dance.
Her mother was her usual clingy self, and beginning to get on Hannah’s nerves, until Sophie swooped in and whisked her away to meet some foreign dignitary.
As lovely as the party was, as much as she enjoyed seeing her friends and family, not to mention hobnobbing with the worlds elite, she couldn’t seem to stop thinking about after the party. When she and Phillip would finally be alone, and free to do whatever they wanted.
She realized that Phillip was thinking the exact same thing when he stepped up beside her and asked, “How soon before we can leave?”
“At eleven o’clock we’re to bid everyone farewell, so we can prepare to leave for our honeymoon.” Even though there wasn’t all that much preparing to do. Her maids had already packed her bags, and she was sure Phillip’s had done the same.
She couldn’t help but think that the instant they left, every single guest was going to know exactly what they were planning to do.
He pulled a pocket watch from his jacket and flipped it open. “It’s ten-fifteen.”
“So we should make the rounds one last time, say our goodbyes and thank-yous.”
He took her arm. “That sounds like an excellent idea.”
They went from group to group, thanking everyone for sharing their special day, hearing more congratulations and good wishes than she could count. There were even a few inquiries of how she felt now that she was officially queen.
“Honored,” was her stock answer. Also terrified and unsure, but she didn’t tell anyone that.
It was five minutes to eleven o’clock and they were saying good-night to the prime minister and his wife, when Hannah had a familiar and unsettling sensation she was being watched. She scanned the room briefly and when she reached the dessert table, her eyes caught on the source.
The dark-haired mystery woman.
She was staring intently at Hannah, this time with open hostility.
What could Hannah have done to a woman she had never even met, to earn such a look?
She wanted to point her out to Phillip, but he was in the middle of a conversation and she didn’t want to appear rude by interrupting him. When she turned to look at the woman again, she was gone.
Hannah looked around frantically, trying to locate her, but it was as if she’d vanished. Like the last time, she even entertained the notion that she’d imagined her.
“Is something wrong?” Phillip asked.
She looked up to see that he was watching her with concern. She considered telling him about the woman, but what good would it do, now that she was gone? She smiled instead and said, “I’m fine. Just looking for my mother so I can say goodbye.”
“Let’s go find her so we can get out of here.”
Hannah was sure the woman was no one, and she had nothing to be concerned about. So far her wedding day had been perfect, and she wasn’t going to let anything ruin it.
Still, somewhere deep down, she couldn’t help feeling the slightest twinge of something unpleasant. A foreshadow of something to come.
It was 11:15 p.m. by the time Phillip walked Hannah to her suite. He left to change out of his uniform while she went inside where her maids were waiting to help her out of her gown. To unfasten the row of miniscule buttons up the back.
It seemed to take forever, but finally she was free. She dismissed them immediately, so she’d have time to see to all the preparations she had been planning.
She took the box down from her closet, the one she had been saving for this day, and from inside of it pulled out the pure-white, silk-and-lace nightgown. She slipped it on and it dripped over her body like liquid, conforming to every curve.
Since Phillip liked her hair down, she fished out the pins then brushed out all the gel and hairspray until it lay shiny and soft against her shoulders. She dabbed a touch of perfume behind her ears and along her collarbone.
As Hannah asked, Elizabeth had decorated the bedroom with white candles. Dozens of them on every possible flat surface, all lit. When she turned out the lights, the effect was exactly what she had hoped for. Soft, flickering light.
The maids had turned the bed down and left two perfect red rosebuds, one on each pillow. A bottle of champagne chilled in a stand by the dresser.
It was exactly as she’d imagined.
“You’ve been busy,” Phillip said.
She jolted with surprise and spun around. He stood, leaning in the bedroom doorway, watching her. He wore slacks and a long-sleeved silk shirt that was untucked and lay open. His skin looked warm and golden in the candlelight.
She felt absolutely naked in the scant gown, but she resisted the urge to cover herself. She didn’t want him to know how nervous she was. “I didn’t hear you knock.”
“That’s because I didn’t. I thought you wouldn’t mind, now that we’re married.” He walked toward her, a hungry look in his eyes as they raked over her. “It would seem that I’m overdressed.”
The shirt slipped off his shoulders, down his arms and landed on the floor. The candles were supposed to make her look good, but, oh my goodness, he was beautiful.
He didn’t stop until he was standing right in front of her. She just hoped he didn’t notice the thud of her heart, the way her hands trembled. She didn’t want him to know how nervous she felt.
He reached up and touched the lacey edge of the gown where it rested on the swell of her breast. “This is nice.”
She swallowed hard, willing herself to relax.
“Nervous?” he asked.
“No,” she said, but it came out as more of a squeak than an actual word. She cleared her throat and amended her answer to, “Maybe a little. Are you?”
He grinned and shook his head.
Of course he wasn’t. Unlike her, he had done this before.
He leaned down, kissed her bare shoulder, his lips soft, his breath warm on her skin. “You smell good,” he said.
So did he. She loved the way he smelled, the way he felt, yet she couldn’t seem to make herself touch him.
Why was she so afraid? It wasn’t as though she had never touched him before. But for some reason this time was different. Maybe because she knew what the end result would be.
His hands settled on her hips, large and steady, and she couldn’t help it when she tensed.
“Relax, Hannah.”
She took a deep breath and blew it out.
“I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do. This is my first time.”
Rather than act disappointed, he smiled. Not condescending either. This was a smile of pure affection. “Just do what comes naturally. Act on your instincts.”
That was the problem. Her instincts seemed to have lost their voice.
“You could start by touching me.” He took her hand in his and pressed it flat against his chest. It felt so solid under her palm, his skin hot to the touch.
He tugged her closer, nuzzling the hollow behind her ear. It felt amazing, better than amazing.
He nipped the curve where her neck met her shoulder, making her skin shiver with awareness. “Honestly, I wasn’t sure you were a virgin.”
“You weren’t?” How could he not tell?
“Not after that night in my suite. You seemed to have a pretty good grasp on what you were doing.”
He kissed her throat, the line of her jaw. “This is no different.”
His hands slid up her sides, his thumbs brushing the outermost edge of her breasts. She felt them tingle, the tips tighten into painful points.
“So, no man has touched you like this?” he asked.
“Nope.”
“Never?”
She shook her head. She could see by his smile that he liked knowing she was his, and his only. She liked it, too.
“No one ever did this?” He cupped her breasts in his hands and a whimper slipped from her lips. His thumbs grazed back and forth, teasing her, and her skin went hot.
Then he picked her up and placed her on the bed. He unfastened his pants and slid them off.
Hannah couldn’t help but be drawn to the front of his boxers. To the impressive-looking ridge underneath. She was no expert, but he looked…generous.
He settled beside her, propped up on his elbow, smiling down at her. A sleepy, sexy grin. “Here we are.”
“Here we are,” she agreed. Finally. She had been beginning to feel as if this day would never come.
He brushed her breast with his lips. Once, then twice, then he took her in his mouth, silk and all, and the sensation was so shockingly intense that she gasped and arched her back.
She couldn’t help wondering what other places he could use his mouth.
He hooked his index finger around one strap of her gown and eased it down her arm until her entire breast was exposed. And when he took her in his mouth this time, there was no fabric barrier. This time she felt everything. His tongue, his teeth. The wet heat.
A sound came out of her, like a moan, but more desperate, and she realized her fingers were tunneling through his hair. She was arching against his mouth, urging him to take more.
Phillip seemed to be fascinated by her. He kissed her breasts, her mouth, touched her in ways that made her shudder and quake. And her own hands seemed to have taken on a life of their own, exploring the secrets of his body, touching him like she had only imagined in her most intimate fantasies.
It wasn’t long before the gown that was meant to arouse him was only getting in the way.
“This has to go,” he ordered, helping her tug it up over her head, until the only thing left was a pair of scant thong panties made of the same fragile lace. Then he just looked at her, his eyes dark with arousal. “You’re beautiful.”
She felt beautiful, and not the least bit afraid. In fact, she couldn’t imagine why she had been so nervous. This was so absolutely and completely right. She had never felt so close to him. To anyone.
He touched the minuscule triangle of lace between her thighs and it felt so amazing she nearly vaulted off the bed.
He eased her thong down her legs so slowly that she got impatient and kicked it the rest of the way off. Then she did something that surprised them both. She reached for the waistband of his boxers and tugged at them. She wanted them both to be naked.
He captured her mouth with his and kissed the last of her sense completely away. She didn’t think she could be any more aroused, but somehow Phillip managed. Kissing her, touching her, until she could hardly stand it.
What felt like hours later, he eased himself over her, between her thighs. “I’ll take it slow.”
But she didn’t want slow. She wanted to feel all of him now. She reached for his hips and pushed them hard against her.
She shuddered a moment, and then the pain was gone. What she felt instead was indescribable. She felt…complete. The ultimate in closeness.
He thrust into her, slowly at first, then faster.
She wound her legs around his, dug her nails into his shoulders. “Phillip,” she begged, even though she had no idea what she was begging for.
He thrust himself inside her again, harder this time, and she was so stunned by the sensation she cried out.
He eased back and thrust again. Phillip could feel her inner walls flex and contract around him. Her eyes looked bleary and unfocused and her skin was blushed and hot.
He had never seen anything more arousing or sexy. Had never been with a woman so easy to please. And though it was taking every bit of concentration he could muster to maintain control, he didn’t want to rush this.
But he could feel her losing it, feel her body clenching down on him. Then she tensed and bucked up against him. Her eyes went wide and sightless, with shock and pleasure and wonder. That was all it took. He lost it. His body coiled then released, letting go in a hot rush that seemed to wring the last trace of energy from his very cells. And for a minute, he couldn’t find the strength to do more than breathe.
* * *
Hannah was gazing up at him, looking just as physically spent as he felt. Her cheeks and chest were deep red and her breath was coming in short, sharp bursts.
“Are you okay?”
She nodded, but when he shifted his weight, she grimaced.
“Hurt?”
“A little,” she admitted.
He eased off her slowly, then he rolled onto his back and pulled her along with him. She curled up against his side in the crook of his arm, soft and warm and boneless, her head resting on his shoulder. The covers had somehow wound up in a bunch at their feet, but it didn’t matter. He was so relaxed he felt as if he were melting into the mattress.